If You Never Hear The Words “Will You Marry Me?”

What if You Never Hear Those Words

What if you never hear the words “will you marry me”. What if God came down tonight and told you that a husband and being a wife was not something He had in store for you but something greater.

Would you quit serving Him? Would your prayer life come to an end? Would you jump off a bridge? Would you still go to church? Would you still seek Gods face?

Yes, I know I’m being “extra” but the truth is God doesn’t owe us a man and some of us are basing our entire existence around this ONE moment…When Mr. Right will get down on his knee, ask us to be his wife and whisk us off into the sunset to live happily ever after. We start off our statements with “when I meet my husband” as though life suddenly starts when we have a ring on our finger.

If its one thing God did in me this past year is pop my little fairytale, Disney land bubble. The bubble of perfection and fantasy that most of us women have when it comes to what marriage TRULY is about. What the Hollywood movies don’t show is the arguments, the flaws, the tears, the brokenness, the two people both having jacked up pasts and having to undo ALL of the garbage they’ve picked up along the way… and they DEFINITELY don’t show Jesus HAVING to be at the center of it.

I think we kind of adopted that “fairytale” idea of thinking and just put a Christianized twist to it. Instead of calling him “prince charming” we call him “Boaz”. Instead of calling our selves a princess we call ourselves “Ruth”. But the reality is Boaz was a mere man. He was not JESUS. He was not perfect. He had flaws, and I’m sure he had issues, just like every other great man mentioned in the bible.

We cannot put our life on hold for a ring because in all honesty, it may not happen. I know that is not the most popular thing to say but that is the REALITY. We can “declare and decree” all day long that this is our year to get married but ultimately our love lives are in God’s hand and I honestly believe with all my heart that His desire is for us to be so enamored and SO in love with Him that marriage would be the icing on our cake and not what we’re waiting on to complete us.

Francis Chan is probably one of my FAVORITE preachers and authors (Please read Crazy Love, it’ll change ya life!) because he focuses on loving God and our lives being a reflection of that. His sermons are really what helped me to start thinking about eternity and the fact that I have work to do here on this earth and I can’t afford to just sit here and waste time focused on anything that is temporary. The reality is, I can DIE tomorrow. (I know someone is reading that and saying “why would you say that” lol) but it’s the truth. That is the hardcore truth. I can die tomorrow as a SINGLE woman. How would I have wanted to spend my last days on earth? Using my gifts to bless other women or complaining about my relationship status? I get caught up sometimes, not gonna even lie, but when I start to think about that question, it quickly snaps me back to reality.

The bottom line is this. We cannot afford to waste anymore time moping around and complaining. Like, are we not aware of how more and more ratchet this world is getting? How crazy and evil these times are? Who else is gonna be the “light” in this world but US, His sons and daughters? How can we be the light and be purpose driven if our ONLY purpose is making down the altar. Heaven is the finish line, not the altar. Let’s stay focused. Lets use our gifts and talents to serve Him wholeheartedly. If you’re single, take FULL advantage of this time to just sit at His feet. Learn how to be alone with just Him. Enjoy life. Smile. Laugh. Enjoy life. Serve like crazy. Love on people like crazy. Give like crazy. CHOOSE to live life to the fullest for His glory with or without a ring.

Love Ya’ll! xox
Scripture References:

Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand.- Colossians 3:2

“You must not have any other god but me.”- Exodus 20:3

“Love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.”- Mathew 22:37
P.S – Marriage is a GIFT from God that He created for His glory. It’s just that we need to make sure that we’re always worshipping the creator and not His creation. If you’re at the place where you KNOW you’ve been making marriage an idol, confess it to God. Be real with Him, and ask Him to help you to be consumed by Him and not marriage. It’s a process. Don’t beat yourself up. xox

A Kings Love Convos: The Inner Woman…


Hey beautiful ladies! Check out this episode of “A Kings Love Convos” entitled “The Inner Woman”. So many times we focus on “rules” and the “outside appearance” of LOOKING holy but not really focusing on our hearts being transformed into the image of Christ. Not wearing makeup, or wearing skirts is not what makes us right with God, a heart renewed by His spirit is what makes us right with Him. Take a look and don’t forget to subscribe. Love ya’ll! xoxox

The Distracted LifeGuard..


Imagine you’re on the beach chillin’ & soaking up the sun. Over in the ocean, you realize there are people who need help. Somehow the tidal waves got a little crazy and people were drowning. You panic and you look for a lifeguard. The lifeguard see’s whats going on, but he’s on his phone scrolling through Facebook. He’s on Youtube and Instagram not really paying attention and on his job.

You’re astonished. Angry. Confused. “Are you serious? You’re just sitting there meanwhile people are drowning and fighting for their life and you’re main concern is how many people “liked your picture”? Dude. Really? ” Part of you wants to smack him but the other part of you is just too worried about those people who are crying out for help. Every second counts at this point.. Its literally life or death. These people are about to drown…

And they do.

After 10minutes of people going crazy & fighting to stay afloat, the waves end up being too strong and too powerful. They’re gone. They’ve drowned.

So many of us are that distracted lifeguard. We have the lifelines which is Jesus and prayer. We have the tools & the resources to help save people. But we’re TOO distracted by “life” to even care. (Goodness, this post is convicting me). Ask yourself this question and BE honest: How much time do you spend praying for OTHER people to get saved compared to the time you spend on social media? How much time do you spend praying for OTHER people and caring for their soul, even your own family?

There are people drowning in sin. Drowning in depression, self hatred, suicide, hopelessness, brokenness and fear but we’re too content with just going to church on Sunday and fulfilling our quota for the week. This is not to criticize or judge anyone (I have been so guilty of this myself) but its to really make us evaluate what in the world we are doing.

Like that lifeguard sitting in a chair on his iPad, we too are distracted by meaningless things while people are literally dying. We’re too focused on “finding our Adam”, or “chasing paper” or chasing success. For some of us, those people who are drowning are our family members. Whens the last time we really sat there and prayed for “those” family members who drive us up the wall and who we can’t stand?

When people are drowning, every single second counts. A lifeguard can’t afford to be distracted. You sis, are many people’s lifeguard. There are people who God specifically & strategically placed in your life whose salvation maybe connected to YOUR prayer life. Your obedience and your focus is not only about you, its about the people AROUND you. You may be the ONLY person in someone’s life that even believes in the power of prayer. You maybe the ONLY person that your boss knows that would ever think to pray for him (no matter how much of jerk YOU may think he is).

No shade and not being critical but we all really need to step it up. This world is getting darker and more twisted by the second. People are dying. People are drowning. The power of Jesus is the ONLY hope. We have that power in us. Lets use it. Log off Facebook. Stop worrying about your “Adam”. Get on your knees and pray like people’s lives depended on it because the truth is….

It does.

Pray. love. Give. Serve. Tell the world about who He is. He is our only hope.

Love yall! Xox

Before You Pressure A Man To Be Your “Everything”…..


Understand that he is HUMAN. Yes he may be a fine God fearing man but he is still growing and learning just like you. Understand that a man was not designed to cater to your every need and to shuck & jive just to please you, but his PURPOSE is to please God FIRST and through him pleasing God will be able to love you the way God intended. Understand that he is not perfect and will make mistakes. Understand that he needs grace and prayer just like YOU do. Understand that he is a man with FEELINGS, FEARS, and INSECURITIES and may not always measure up to Gods standard because he is a FLAWED human.

Understand that your “boaz” or your “future boaz” may be a blessing, but he isn’t your savior and didn’t die on a cross for your sins. One of his assignments maybe to be your husband but his assignment was and IS, NEVER to be your God…

So I say all this to say, look to God to make you whole. Seek God for validation and security. Even the godliest of “godly men” will NEVER be able to complete you and fully satisfy your souls cravings. Sometimes I forget that. Sometimes I put WAY too much pressure on my guy to be EVERYTHING a “christian boyfriend” is ” supposed” to be. Sometimes I forget that his job isn’t to please me but to please GOD and be the man that Gods called HIM to be for His glory. Sometimes I get too clingy…

And then the holy spirit reminds me that my wholeness is found in Jesus Christ alone.. Not in a man. Not in a relationship status. Not in ANYTHING else other than the cross. Being clingy is not cute. Lol When you try to force someone to be your everything, you become a burden instead of a blessing because you’re placing all of this extra pressure on him that he was never meant to carry. He maybe Christian but he is not Christ. Love him like crazy. Pray for him. Respect him. Show him grace. Be patient. Forgive and most importantly let God be God in YOUR life. Make God your “everything”, not him. ❤️


When You Entertain The Devil and Don’t Even Realize It..


No this isn’t some spooky post to get you afraid of the “little red guy with horns and pitchfork running around chasing people”.. This is about something much more realistic.. Something that we ALL go through whether we’re aware of it or not and whether we believe it exists or not..

A little something called spiritual warfare..

Yes hun. God has a plan for your life and its a good plan. I can’t promise that the path will be easy… It will probably be a path that will challenge you but most importantly it will be a path that DEVELOPS you. Its a path that He wills for all His girls go walk in… A path of love, purity, self-denial, holiness, peace, joy, servanthood and light. Its a beautiful path to walk on once you find it by surrendering your life to Him.

Sounds great right?

There’s a flip side to it though.


The Pretty Trash Can..


Soooo… you have this friend. Every time you guys get together, she complains about this HORRIBLE smell coming from her apartment, not to mention there are tons and tons of fly’s EVERYWHERE. It’s making her sick and you have no idea what to say in response to her smelly fly problem other than “ew”…

A week later, you guys hang out but this time at her apartment. You notice a HUGE pile of trash in the middle of her living room and it all makes sense where her house “problems” are coming from. For some odd reason she doesn’t seem to realize that the PILE of trash is what’s SMELLING up the place and causing all of these maggots to spring up but instead of her cleaning up the mess, she steps out, goes to the 99cents store to pick up some air freshener and fly tape….

You just give her the blank stare…

This is an example of what A LOT of our lives look like. We complain and focus on the problems that stem from the trash that’s IN our hearts and instead of CLEANING up the trash through giving our hearts to Jesus and allowing Him to cleanse us, we just try to spray some air freshener on it instead of getting to the ROOT of the issue. We just try to put a little flin-stone band-aid on a wound that needs (more…)

The “Boaz” Myth…

The Boaz Myth

Can I be honest? There is NOTHING like being with a God fearing man.. A man who pushes you closer to Jesus every chance he gets.. A man who loves you flaws and all and whose commitment you never have to question.. Its SUCH a blessing to have your man be your biggest cheerleader& who wants nothing more than to see his lady be the woman that God has called her to be..

Its a gift. Its a blessing. But its not EVERYTHING..

Being in relationship can be ROUGH. Its not all sunshine, rainbows and lollipops.. The world portrays relationships as this wonderful merry go around that always ends up in a happily ever.. Unfortunately i feel like that same mentality has seeped into us (the church) and women think that by waiting on a God fearing man, its gonna be smooth sailing.. We OVER ROMANTICIZE meeting “our boaz” as though he’s gonna be a dark skinned Jesus, sent to make us whole and take all our pain away (or whatever your preference might be lol)..

But the truth is.. Godly relationships are ROUGH if not rougher..


A Jesus Groupie Diaries: Fake Obedience…

Amy Rigdon

In late August I went on a retreat upstate with the young adults group from my church. As soon as I got off the bus I had a HUGE smile on my face! I was going to be in nature, surrounded by people my age, do fun actives, make new friends and worship like crazy! I had a “yeah let’s do this” kind of attitude!!! (woo hoo!) Fun Fun Fun…..

Then for some reason,  out of nowhere, I started feeling discontent and shaken. I wasn’t as confident nor as excited as I had been.

Service began, the band started playing and I hit a wall. My heart felt so hard. I was singing but the words were empty. I felt everyone around me raising their hands, singing with passion. Yet I stood still, hands down, lips still. I closed my eyes and cried out to God “Hello, don’t you see me? I’m here in the middle of nowhere, smack dab in the middle of these woods, searching for you! Why do I feel so far from you?” Frustrated, I stood there motionless. Fortunately, I waited long enough to hear God say “Darling, let go.” I knew exactly what he meant. Deep in my heart I was holding on to something that I didn’t want to let go of. I was living a life of disobedience of as I would like to call it… FAUXBEDIENCE. I was reading the Bible, praying, having conversation with God but I had hit a wall…. 

Having a relationship with Christ isn’t about going through the motions. It’s about being open WITH your emotions. God wanted me to dig deeper…Reading the Bible and going to church wasn’t all God wanted from me. He wanted me to stop ignoring his voice and OBEY. (James 1:22 But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise you are only fooling yourselves)

You can’t score a touchdown without running the field. I wanted to move on to the future without dealing with my past and dealing with what God was telling me to DO in the present.

By this time, the pastor had asked us to high five our neighbor and I had burst into tears of breakthrough! I had reached true surrender. I saw what life would be like if I kept holding on to that issue, and I didn’t like it! I went to bed that night excited to obey. I didn’t know what that meant at the time and it didn’t matter. All God wanted was my willingness to follow his lead and trust that there was something better on the other side. I loosened my grip, found strength and confronted the situation. I know my heavenly father was so proud of me because I was proud of myself….

Every season will bring new obstacles but I pray this story leaves you with a fresh desire to be obedient to WHATEVER God may be telling you to do.. Only YOU know what that is.. My story is still being written but I know I want to live it with two hands wide open, lifted to the sky. Good bye fauxbedience, center stage is obedience… I challenge you to do the same :-)

Love, Amy Rigdon xox

When The Honeymoon Phase Is Over…



The beginning of a new relationship is sweet, exciting, and passionate to say the least. You can’t keep your mouth shut about how BOMB your new man/woman is. You can’t stop thinking about them. EVERY little thing they do is just so “cute” to you. You re-read their text messages over and over like it’s the greatest poem you’ve ever read. Your heart skips a beat when they walk into a room. The thought of you guys NOT living happily ever after is ABSURD and just down right ridiculous. You’re committed and FEEL like you want to spend of your life with this person…awww (how sweet and romantic..)

And than the honeymoon ends and reality sets in….

Real life happens and you realize that things aren’t as easy as you anticipated. The initial “high” you had has worn off and you’re no longer on cloud 9. Your feet are now on the ground and you learn that great relationships don’t just “happen” but that they take hard work, love and a kind of commitment that surpasses mushy, lovey, dovey, emotions. You learn that it”s about sticking it out regardless of how you FEEL. You learn that there are days when you FEEL madly in love with him/her and then there are days where you question whether or not you made a mistake by even entering a relationship with them…

I remember feeling that way about God when I first got saved about 3 years ago. ALL I wanted to do was learn more and more about Him and who He was. I was jobless, friendless, and manless and had all the time in the world yet I was SO joyful because I got to spend all this time with my new found love. I would literally spend HOURS listening to sermons back to back because I wanted to learn as much as I possibly could. I remember waking up feeling anxious and excited to read the bible (its amazing how God will change your desires). I was on fire and my heart was all His. I was at a place where I was so in love with Him that I would be willing to do WHATEVER He said. If He would of told me to pack my bags and move to Zimbabwe, I would of done it, no questions asked…

3 years later I’m still madly in love with God but I would be lying if I said that that love FEELS the same as when I first got saved. I would often pray and beg God to get me back to that place again where I was wide-eyed and bushy tailed and wanting to go wherever He lead Me..

LOVE surpasses the honeymoon phase when everything is exciting and your FEELINGS for the object of your affection is on level 10. As with a relationship with a guy/girl, our relationship with God often starts out in the “honeymoon” phase until we begin to get comfortable. WE stop pursuing Him like we once did. We get complacent with just reading the bible on Sundays and hearing a 20 minute sermon. We no longer pray and talk to God everyday like we did in the beginning. Instead of being bold and on fire, we allow our fire to dwindle down and become lukewarm Christians who just go through the motions.

If I can be real, I personally am at a place where God is teaching me the true definition of commitment. He’s teaching me how to push past how I FEEL and pursue Him regardless. Honestly, sometimes I don’t feel like praying. Sometimes I don’t feel like reading my bible. Sometimes, I don’t FEEL like going to church. Sometimes I don’t feel like going around and telling people my testimony and the power of Jesus. Sometimes I don’t FEEL like blogging. Sometime I don’t FEEL like being pure.. But the bottom line is this Mathew 16:24- “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” That means that my FEELINGS and what I “felt” like doing, were no longer relevant the day I decided to follow Jesus. It means that through Gods GRACE, I am now submitted to His will..It’s no longer about (insert your name here)…Its about HIM..

You maybe in a season right now where you feel like your relationship with God is DRY. You know scripture, you know how to pray and you know church yet you don’t FEEL the presence of God like you once did. You feel as if your prayers are hitting the ceilings and nothing is moving or changing. Sorry but I don’t have a deep motivational message that’s gonna all of a sudden make you FEEL the presence of God but I will say this…

Your love relationship with God should go PAST a good feeling. Love is self denial. It’s commitment. It’s discipline. It’s doing what you don’t FEEL like doing. It’s holding on even when it feels like your holding on to thin air. It’s worshipping God even when you FEEL like He isn’t listening and is sending your prayers to His spambox. It’s giving even when you’re broke and fearful about how you’re going to pay your rent. Love isn’t a “good feeling”. It’s a deep, supernatural sacrificial action word that surpasses tingly emotions. So I encourage you to keep seeking. Keep reading. Keep pursuing God…even when you don’t FEEL like it. Yes, the honeymoon phase may be over but all that means is that it’s time to grow into a deeper relationship with our amazing God….a relationship that surpasses those sweet, tingly feelings that you once had <3

Love yall! xox


A Jesus Groupies Diaries: The Five Heartbreaks…

Having so many heartbreaks is probably one of the main reasons I decided to give my life to Christ. Period.
I’m not ashamed to say that it was not by some strong physical or spiritual force, or an individual Bible verse that changed my heart. Plain and simple I was tired of being hurt, used and disrespected by men, I couldn’t take it anymore, and if you ever had your heartbroken before, you know the feeling, its like your ENTIRE body aches….
Ached when “he” called and said he was engaged and getting married to another woman. “Wait, what?! Aren’t we currently dating?”
 Ached when “he” had a child with someone else.
Ached when the day after “he” broke up with me, his ex-fiancee was on the scene looking like not a day has gone by since their last encounter.
I could feel my heart becoming tatted, torn and  turning an ugly shade of purple and black but  my solution to this heartbreak diagnosis wasn’t to give up dating completely, (of course not, why would I do that? A man was one of my greatest treasures to posses!!!!). No. My solution was just to find another man who I “thought” would make me feel better until the wounds from  Dudes A-Z healed. If you’ve been there, I know you can relate but he problem is, it just never measures up…well at least for me, it didn’t..
 We were meant to be completed by God and God alone. The desire to be loved and wanted isn’t a sin. It is how God wired and programmed us, but we are meant to fill that hole up with the love of our Lord and Savior Christ who earnestly wants you to fall in love with him. Him 1st! Having a husband is biblical and if it is ordained by God, favor from Him is doused over your relationship. Sex is the gift that says God isn’t a prude but He wants us to wait on Him. I believe its worth it, and although I haven’t experienced it myself yet, I am seeing it in action right now through my sisters in Christ and watching their relationships with the opposite sex flourish. God’s way works, don’t be fooled by “Hollywood”, His “Holy word” truly outlines love in the most romantic way you can dream of.
But back to me…
I remember crying at the altar one Sunday after an encounter with the Holy Spirit and hearing a sermon entitled “The Way God Sees Us”.. I said to God in that moment of desperation. “I vow to you, if you heal me, if you heal these wounds, I will give my life and body to you as a living sacrifice”. I was determined to see this vow through… (sounds pretty good and spiritual right?
But there was one problem… MY FLESH and my selfishness..
I sinned after this in a way that broke my heart. I thought during the healing process, me. my exes and boos could still be friends. I would still go to church on Friday nights for our Young Adult Ministry, but pack a bag and go to Dude E house for a sleep over. I stated to him clearly that we wasn’t going to be having any sex as I flashed my celibacy ring in his face, and although he told me he had needs and he wasn’t going to ignore him, I continued to be around him. (I will go more in depth about Christians women mixing with unbelievers at another time) but this was my BIG mistake. Once you have a standard, just know that it comes with a major commitment..  Of course he wasn’t going to take my demands for not having sex seriously… I myself wasn’t taking them seriously. I was up in his bed with lingerie talking about “I am saved and I aint having sex”…. but of course.. we ended up having sex!!
My heart broke. It hurt so bad, The disappointment I felt is indescribable. I knew in that moment that this could never happen again. I needed to give this Christian life my FULL heart or nothing at all.  Ya see, the thing about sin is this, if you keep at it, there will come a day where you no longer feel convicted about it. Your heart becomes hardened to God and His word.  If I would have continued to have sex, the conviction of the Holy Spirit would have started to fade. I was going to now deliberately turn my face away from God.  I probably would of been in the same positions I was in before I cried at the altar… I knew  that I couldn’t let sin deceive me. Not again…
 Remember, your walk with the Lord is ALL or nothing.
Matthew 16:24 (NLT) ” If any of you want to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross and follow me”
Matthew 7:13-14 ” The highway to hell is broad and its gate is wide for many who choose that way, but the gateway to life is very narrow and the ONLY A FEW ever find it”.
Jesus for real, only a few???
Christianity is an everyday walk, it isn’t a sprint to the finish line.  It took me months to really lay down my bad habits like drinking excessively when I had a bad day, watching pornography whenever I was aroused or bored, keeping in contact with Tim, Don and Henry whenever I got lonely, gossiping with friends, being over critical (the Lord is still working with me in this area), cursing and most importantly my purity.  It wasn’t all deliberate. I just let the Holy Spirit over time do its job to transform me.
Lets be real, the process wasn’t pretty. I cried and cried some nights about my relationships, and being alone. I hated the weekends! Even my female friendships was a MESS. I was friendless and manless. It was rough. But to be honest it still isn’t always pretty. It can be difficult sometimes to watch everyone around you have someone and be all in love and you’re just standing around like a square, or so it seems.
 It can hurt.
But those are feelings. Feelings are temporary and fleeting. I had to learn that if I prayed to Jesus to heal me, then obviously I have a faith in him, therefore I needed to apply that same faith to believe what He said in His word about finding the gates of heaven. I wanted to be apart of few that find His gate no matter how rough it was getting there.  I had to believe ALL of what the Bible said or believe nothing that the bible said. Its simple.
I prayed for friends and He blessed me in that area in ways greater than I could of  dreamed. We aren’t perfect, but I can say I never knew friendship could be this beautiful. I sometimes cry, because I am humbled by their love.  But even in all that, it STILL  takes WORK and faith in Him..
Honestly, the journey gets difficult and the process was downright hard..There were many lonely nights and tear stained pillows but I can honestly sit here and say that I’ve come to really love and value myself. I’ve come to realize that I am worth too much to let anyone undo the work and transformation that He has already DONE.. I found true love in Him.. How can I ever look back??
If you are hurting or in despair for any reason (not just because of men) but for any reason AT ALL, I encourage you to lean on God for strength no matter how you FEEL. Take your frustrations to Him. I know through EXPERIENCE that He is the best seamstress I have ever met. He has knit my heart back together and I am never looking back, I am picking up my cross with my eyes fixated on him, even through the tears, fighting the lures of sin everyday.. and  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that when I receive my crown it will ALL be worth it.  Have faith in it! 
I pray you be blessed.